In Everything Let God Be Glorified

When I saw the photo of the passengers on the plane from the “Miracle on the Hudson” a few years back, just standing there, shivering and cold, but alive, on the wings of the aircraft manned by Captain Sully, the American Airlines pilot who landed his plane safely, over the waters of the Hudson River, I was moved to tears.

This quiet unpretentious man who would not take credit for having accomplished the impossible –landing his plane over water, thereby saving his passengers — set the best example of great leadership in action. Later, he humbly stated to the media journalists, that he was “just doing his job” and expressed embarrassment, over being showered with accolades by people celebrating his heroic efforts.

Saving the lives of 155 people is not something people do every day, but even when the world witnessed this miraculous landing, of an aircraft on water (something planes have never survived before, without breaking apart after the nose of the plane or a wing clips the water), he felt embarrassed that he was being celebrated as a hero.

That moment to me, was a humbling and amazing lesson and I realized that no matter what one’s personal or professional rank, post or position of responsibility is, one should never allow one’s self to be glorified by others. We don’t all have the answers to life’s questions and we don’t all have the solutions to all of life’s problems, in as much as we may wish we to.

Earthly masters, superiors, justices and the clergy, are but vessels who perform missions or tasks, but all power comes from above and it should be used with great responsibility and wisdom. It is important that upon serving others, we always remember that we are here to serve with humility, compassion and grace and consider others.

Whether divinely ordained to a mission, voted into a post or hand-chosen to serve a people, an organization or any kind of political body, we are all still very much human, mortal and prone to making mistakes. Our only hope for success is our ability to keep our heads screwed on right, while fearfully clinging to the faith, that God will lead others to spiritual, morale or economic safety, through us. We are only the channel. The glory should always go to the highest authority, not to us, for we are truly fortunate, just to be where we have been lead and it is only but by His grace alone, that we have received such a responsibility.

Those with any type of a post or title, should remember to use it with great honor and not walk and talk with the dilusion of self empowerment, for we have this great responsibility, only so that we may SERVE others with it. I sincerely pray that I will never at any given moment be tempted to keep silent, when others try to canonize or praise me for anything that I say or do, for I am only a vessell. The glory for all things great that come about, as a result of serving others, should always be extended to God and God Alone (I just realized after writing this that, “God and God Alone is actually the title of an amazingly beautiful and touching song, that American Tenor Daniel Rodriguez sings, in his songs of faith program – “Seeds of Hope” http://tinyurl.com/2dwzkmr).

Leading with understanding, love and compassion, is the responsibility of all leaders, including all heads of state and the President of our country (with all due respect to President and Mrs. Obama, who both have my deepest respect) down to the least of those who are called, or are voted in, to serve. Nobody is be exempt, we are all but humble servants.

I worry, when I hear certain folks constantly invoking the name, of a certain radio personality or leader, placing constant credence and supremacy on what that one man or woman says or does.

Out of our lips should always come the words “The Scriptures say”, for a woman is just a woman and a man is just a man, no matter what great things she or he may say or do, Romans 3:23 “For all Have Sinned and fall short of the glory of God”.

I apologize to others right now, if I should ever gently ask them, not to celebrate something that I may say or do, that strikes them as great or wonderful, because not letting others glorify what we say or do, falls in line with the responsibility of leading others, to the path of truth and righteousness — to the Lord. That walk may be lonely and uncelebrated, but in one’s heart one knows that one has done the absolute right thing.

Photo of “Miracle on the Hudson”:

http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/news/article2136939.ece

A Matter of the Heart

I love networking on Facebook purely for friendship, but if there were ever a business or product to endorse, it would be prints that I produce from an art collection of my own. Art has always been a matter of the heart for me. I am an emotional artist and I have been told many times, that my personal emotions seem to be reflected on past art work. Should I ever come up with a collection of five new excellent pieces, worthy of being sold to the public, I would produce prints of some of my copyrighted work and market it.

What is most important to me, is that what I do comes from my heart and not because I am in some hurry to prove what a wonderful inventive or innovative artist I am. First of all that has already been done before and many times over. I would not be the first. There are brilliant and amazing artists out there with great mastery and skill. Second,without sounding boastful which is not my intent, I have been aware for most of my life that I am capable of being a decent artist. I am able to render what I see, but I’m also able to render from my imagination scenes, people and things that I have never before seen, so trying to prove to someone else, what I already know at this phase in my life, would feel a bit silly.

I think feeling pressured to prove anything to anyone, is a rather absurd thing, it is not fun and is pointless. Besides, some people will love the work of one artist and others will dislike it. People have different tastes and make choices based on their likes and dislikes. The world of art is what it is.

I remember when my work as a student, was exhibited at the Art Student’s League last year by a GREAT artist (Nelson Shanks, http://www.nelsonshanks.com/), I was so excited that I produced this quick blurry video of my exhibit and that must have scared the willies out my mentor and fellow artists, after all I am still a student. Looking back it was a bit of a zealous thing for me to do, although my friends were delighted to see I’d been exhibited.

I am only a student and this is true. However, I am still a student because I choose to be, at a stage when there are people who, whether they ready or not for the big time, would stop taking classes and start producing and selling their art, but honestly, I think it is important to study art and painting is possible forever.

A lifetime of studying, even when one believes one one might be a great artist, is a wonderful, life enriching experience, for many reasons. – 1) The learning of art itself for one. One is exercising the ability to remain teachable and open to criticism.. 2) Then there are the amazing and helpful instructors who teach in this wonderful tranquil learning environment 3) One gets to be critiqued by fellow student artists 4) One gets to enjoy developing a lifetime wonderful friendships with people that one has Art in common with, if nothing else. It cannot get any better than that. Artists are a huge part of this the wonderful art community.

I believe I heard Nelson Shanks share that with us at his Studio last year. I recall him saying something like “I too, continue to learn” and this is an artist, who has been compared to Michaelangelo and who has painted heads of state, princesses and royalty. By keeping one’s feet on the ground, first, one doesn’t make a fool out of his or her teachers and mentors, by putting out a mediocre product and second, when you know you are ready to produce and market art, you will know that the time has come. Second, you feel a bit more teachable. I am so happy to feel that I remain open to learning. Dan Thompson our instructor at the ASL is also another amazing artist and I love his style of teaching.

I don’t advise artists to hold back and not start collections and marketing their work. If they choose to do that, it is an individual thing, but for me that time just hasn’t come yet. I want to study a bit, maybe take my teacher’s advice and spend a month in Florence, Italy or France, study and paint more and take in the essence of what truly makes fine art.

I want to be great, but don’t know if I will ever be. Still, great artwork or not, what is important to me is that the love for my work is written all over my art collection and that people actually feel and see that love, when they see every expression or the strokes that I put on paper or canvass.

Some day, I dream seeing one of my art pieces help give an answer to someone who needs that missing puzzle piece, or would help someone to make a connection to that great someone higher than themselves, or that it would give others “Aha!” moments! Will that happen? I don’t know myself. I am still an artist in training. http://www.studioincamminati.org/

Whether I produce one, two or three good pieces, or whether they auction or not for public display is not what is important, to me Art is a Matter of the Heart.

I’m taking the summer off, but will keep practicing during the summer and in September I will be right back at ASL and take some weekend workshops at Studio Incamminati.

[This article can also be found on WordPress - http://tinyurl.com/2akwxf5]

Women and Self Confidence: “I Hope You’ll Dance”

It took years for me to realize that God had blessed me with so much, that I had no reason to use something, a place, group or thing as a crutch to find out who I really am and what my potential really is as a woman.

I love art and photography and love to talk so I thought, why not start some businesses, specializing in things that I enjoy and I am familiar with.

I have to monetize them and I don’t know where this is going, as I’m still learning the ropes, but now I have started a media company (still in it’s developmental stages) and a broadcasting site (in pilot), a photography business, which is just beginning to flourish, and other ventures. I put my best foot forward, but not before I did some heavy duty, honest self examination, to really learn who I really am and what good things I can do as a person, that would encompass helping others and making the world a better place.

I have been laughed at by some, to my face about it and even mocked and then there have been those whispers behind my back, that people thought I would never find out about, but I chose to move on with my work. It could be that it may all crumble some day, who knows, all good things sometimes must come to an end, but even then, I know I would have the peace of knowing that I gave it my best and did it.

Life is about trying, failing, getting up and trying yet again.

I urge women to dare to take a walks ALONE. Because, setting business, religion and therapy aside, in the end the only one who can help you sort out insecurity other than the Lord is – YOU. That first quiet walk that I took, was a step in the right direction. For most of my life, I had been waiting for encouragement and the support that came in dribs and drabs from people, but it was never enough. People supported me yet, I couldn’t see that there was reason for why they paid compliments and why in some way, they were inspired by something I said or did. I had the goods (talent, looks, voice, iintelligence) but I did not have the confidence. I was not being my own best friend. Being alone, was hard for me. Solitude was always hard on me. I didn’t seem to feel happy or comfortable with who I was, where it was necessary for me to feel at my best, when I was alone.

God had placed all of the reasons why I should feel confident about myself right there under my nose or on my lap as some would say, but I had been failing to see them. Living with confidence means that when the crowds are gone, when there are no crutches or people rallying around you, that you like who you are and how God has made you, acknowledging that all that He has given to you is reason enough for you to feel confident, secure, inspired and able to inspire. If one is only happy when mingling in crowds, groups or gatherings and feeling popular around others, yet find’s one’s self crashing with no self confidence when one is alone, there is a lot of footwork to be done in the arena of self confidence. God always helps find the answers, but that one decision to become confident takes more than waving a magic wand or saying a prayer and waiting for it all to be well. We have a brain and limbs that we have been given by the good Lord to do the ground work, for the only way that we can become self confident is to become ground breakers ourselves and do things on our own.

There are several steps that one must follow toward becoming confident:

1. Honest self examination. Starting with on question to ask yourself – “Can I compliment someone for work well done, for something special that they do or just for being a wonderful person or friend?” If you have a hard time complimenting your friends, there is something for you to work on.
2. Determining if the people that we fraternize with bring out our self confidence or rob us of it. Question to ask – “Do the friends I currently fraternize with bring out the best in me, when certain moments call for it?” “Will they pay a compliment when I do something well, for my tastes in music, my clothes or things I do well?” If the answer is that your triumphs cannot be celebrated, it may be time to change your circle of friends and say good bye. It doesn’t mean you don’t love them. You just have to part ways. Jacob and Esau his brother had to. It was best for both of them. They loved each other, but could not see eye to eye.  People in friendships and groups, need to have the ‘warm and fuzzies’ about each other (wish I knew who coined that term). If you find yourself criticizing someone for something they do or should be doing or they criticize you more than they compliment you, it may be time to work on the relationship or walk.
3. Learning if one can be self confident without crutches and the aid of people or organizations that we think should be helping us, is something we need to dedicate time and plenty of thought to. If a person, place or thing that you have enlisted as a source of support in helping you to grow as a person, is doing the opposite, be it instilling uncomfortable rules and restrictions that limit your ability to think for yourself, make your own decisions and he/she/it criticizes you more than he/she/it seeks to help you, you may need to decide what and who stays in your life and what and who goes out of your life. Eliminating what stifles you will ultimately create room and space for you to grow as a person and become the individual that God truly wants you to be.

Being the emotional, loving people that we are as women, we have the hardest time deciding when to let go and let God, but letting go doesn’t have to be a hostile move. Letting go can sometimes be a matter of survival, self preservation and the door that opens up the potential for future growth. It is a way that we shield ourselves from the perceptions of others, which can at times serve as a hindrance to us (if we are fragile in our views about ourselves already) and will also prove that we have a backbone and are able to make even the most painful of choices, if our growth and happiness depends on it. The point is to let go with gentleness and love, stating why you feel as you do and why it is that you need to make that choice. The choices we make may be permanent or temporary, but be they what they may be, choices are something that in our life time we need to do a time or two, in order for us to let the person that is inside, the one God has always wanted us to be (and not the one others would wish for us to be), out, to flourish and to succeed.

Maturity is a part of life and those who are sound and want the best for us, really do understand this and why we would need to make choices for ourselves. Those who don’t, may need to learn why they are not happy seeing someone else grow and become more self confident. Is it that they need to be needed? Or do they fear losing closeness with us? Do they need to search inside and really find out what inside of them, they need to work on to help them celebrate and understand the needs of others to become stronger, more well rounded people. I am not a Mom, but I love the song “I hope You’ll Dance,” a mother’s words to her daughter, about coming of age and growing into her own.

My dear friend, I hope you’ll Dance and I wish you well my friend!

Carmen is part of the Braveheart Women’s Global Network – http://braveheartwomen.com/carmeng.    Join for FREE! and signed up for your ID.

Seeing through the Dust to a New Future for Haiti

Can Haiti Rise out of the Dust as a Stronger More Economically Sound Nation?

I believe so.

The current disaster in Haiti can serve to bring focus to the need for change in that country’s economic condition. Perhaps with the help and persistence of the United Nations and the support of wealthier nations, through shared resources, education and restoration, which will in turn create jobs and also the creation of a strong military presence to start creating order out of caos – it is possible.

Economic intervention would no doubt enable the necessary restoration, but support needs to go beyond that, since it is through several decades of strong persistent support, that it would be possible for Haiti to rise up, a stronger more economically stable nation.

Haiti may have a fighting chance at experiencing a good measure of stability and growth, but only if the world keeps focused on extending support, way beyond restoring the structural damage caused by the recent earthquake, and also, if we try to see beyond the violence and chaos that have come about due to the people of Haiti being on survival mode for so long.

The people of this country are truly good people and if given the chance to improve themselves, a new Haiti can be born.

But again, only the support of the stronger nations, with persistence will make it possible to pull this country out of a culture of poverty and violence that has been brought upon by the financial neglect of its government, which from what I have read, needs an overhaul too (and that may need to happen first).

Nobody says it’s going to be easy, but with perseverance, anything is possible. It would be wonderful if we could all see this happen in our lifetime.

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Higher Ground

When were children, we were not responsible. We made foolish choices, had bad judgment and made ignorant decisions, which at times lead up to unsound actions that could have proven catastrohic, because we had no sense of how they might impact our future or the future of others. That was what it was like when we were all children.

Now that we are men and women, we need to chose to take responsibility, to let go of the tragic past, to feel the power we have been given and to make this world the GREAT place that it was intended to be, just because we are in it. Imagine that! And what’s best is that we are in it, because God the giver, the healer and the builder of our lives, has made it so – Not our friends, associates or those close to us.

We are at the hands of the Master Potter, continually being broken by Him and remade. Those that don’t want what’s best for us, may choose to over power and even sabotage us, by creating blockages through innuendo or deceitful whispers, behind our backs, that we may not be aware of. If you learn of it, don’t ever let these things cast you down. You are at the hands of the potter and your life is continually broken and remolded and you are healed, prospered and restored. It is a process of God’s Mastery and perfection continually rebuilding and creating new vessels. Your life is not at the hands of others. It is in God’s hands.

Ignore the voices of ignorance and negativity and follow the one TRUE voice that counts. God did not intend for you to fit somebody elses mold. God made you and broke the mold. You’re unique in your own way. You were not meant to be anybody else, but who He intended you to be. He knew your future and believes that you matter and that your life indeed counts and yes, GREATER things will come, if you mobilize yourself and use the tools that you’ve been given.

Don’t blame others, move on, build, build and build your life and share what you know with others. Keep busy and find your own purpose, everyone else has their own and nothing will stop them, why should anything stop you? Choose not to walk in the company of people that don’t respect you. Every relationship, personal or professional, that has existed since the very foundation of the earth is based on mutual respect. If your friends, or folks you’d expect more from don’t respect you, head for greener pastures. Nobody has a right to dictate how worthy or how deserving you are of anything – only God is in the position to decide. We are living by His ‘Grace,’ not anybody elses.

The grass never remains fertile in places where things get overcrowded and stifling weeds begin grow and choke you. You can stay and choke to death around those that suck the air out of a room when they walk in or you can choose to find your own niche and find ways to grow and excel and you’ll do better going with the latter. So, “Don’t lay blame, don’t complain and many great things you stand to gain.” You were intended to fulfill a greater purpose, so move on to the fertile Higher Ground. Being on your own, IS your Higher Ground and Higher Ground is the only place where anything can actually flourish in the most extraordinary way and it is the only place where you will learn to be, who you were truly intended to be.

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Do You Have The Blessed Will to ‘BE’?

The answer is a hearty “YES.”

We are all made as God chose to make us – perfectly engineered, regardless of our self generated imperfections. I suppose He left some things a bit unfinished, just to give us the chance to polish and master being better, caring, more loving human beings. We cannot shove all of the responsibility to God, he’s given us the ability to ‘aspire’ and gave us two able hands to work on improving the rest of His creation – our mental and physical beings and our lives as a whole – or we would have had fins for limbs and wood for brains. Those who are not able to use their hands and legs due to paralysis, are still perfect works of art in every way. You see, they have been given the greatest gift of all – a ‘Will.’ It is a person’s will that helps bring out powerful and unbelievably beautiful results, helping them to overcome the greatest of obstacles. Someone who does not have full use of their hands or legs is able to master life in a more powerful way than those of us who often take our hands and legs for granted.

The will of a person is able to push through barriers and obstacles and more so, than many who have excellent health and the right tools to get something accomplished. I have seen it with my eyes. The people I am talking about amaze me over and over again, more than any Olympic gold medal winner, than the most talented person I know or the most brilliant writer’s I have read. Artists who paint with their mouths for they have no hands, scientists who cannot move legs and limbs or bat an eye, who are able to solve outer space mysteries. They are amazing.

The will that God has given the human being, goes further than our limbs can, in so many powerful ways. Yes, it’s good to be thankful for our health and all we can do, but we need to remember that a will must be present whether one has use of their limbs or not. Without a will we don’t have much to work with. The will is why a person with no use of their limbs can win a marathon, can paint in oil, can be a scientist and overcome the biggest of obstacles. We should remember to be thankful for having the gift of our own will and determination. One can have use of one’s arms and legs and even be a healthy physically fit person, yet still accomplish nothing, because while they have a will of their own, they choose not to use it and find themselves depending on others to help them out and do things for them. I don’t say this to be critical, I am just saying this because it truly is a sad thing, to have one of the most important things that God has given a human being and yet go through life, not using it.

I know a young lady who sits in a wheel chair. I won’t say her name here, but she has my complete admiration. From where she is, she has made an amazing difference in the lives of so many people. I could never dare complain to her about how bad a day I may be having. This young lady is amazing and if she gave me permission to identify her I would. She has been an amazing fundraiser and has been able to do some truly amazing things with her life and for others. My heart bows to her and I am honored to know her.

The will is one of the gifts that we all possess and have been blessed with. Everyone actually has a will. What is important is that we use the will to be the best person that one can ever be and better, remember to always use it and be thankful that we were blessed with possession of it.

If you don’t have the will to get up in the morning, go to a job, finish a project you started, lose the weight you’re trying to lose (by the way, I have a group at Mastery for Women, where we discuss weight loss issues – http://www.masteryforwomen.com), or take a class and do the basic things, just try to think about the will that you have been given. Just give it a chance to perform for you. Baby steps, tiny little baby steps and you will see, your will develop in to something so enormous, that you will be able to do anything that you set your mind to do.

http://www.masteryforwomen.com

Judge Sonia Sotomayor and the Senate Hearing

I honestly believe that Judge Sonia Sotomayor will be an impartial Supreme Court justice. It is clear to see that some things that she has said in a few speeches have truly been taken a bit out of context.

No, I don’t think she’s better because she is Latina, yet I am a Latina and I can attest that her warmth and her sound judgment, not to mention her unbelievable law background, will carry her through and enable her to be impartial and compassionate. I believe that there is nothing to fear, but fear itself. Goodness, watching the Senate hearing, made me realize that there is so much fear in our country, even at the highest levels.

I look at some (not all) of the powerful silver haired men in the Senate, who honestly know better than to be dishing out all of the media nonsense and I wonder why they cannot seem to tap into the same bravery that once lead them to become elected to the posts that they presently occupy. One hears nothing but fear coming from their voices and I put myself in the place of Judge Sonia and wonder what it must be like to be sitting in that seat, with some of these scared men and women, whose words are coming at her like firing canon balls. And there in that seat, sits a woman that reminds me of my own petite mother (when she was at least two decades younger of course), wearing a tasteful blue suit, just waiting to be blasted away, with media criticisms of some of her speeches and I realize that talk, is just that, talk.

People can sometimes trip themselves up, no matter how wise, or how sound a judgment they may possess, or how eloquently they may deliver speeches. It happens to the best of them and I wonder to myself “Don’t some of these men and women in the Senate know this?” And I ask myself “What are they so afraid of?” I realize I am watching the same brave senators that we voted for in prior elections, putting their fears about this petite woman on display. I cannot help but wonder “Shouldn’t we all have been afraid each time a Supreme Court justice, any justice of any national background (White, Hispanic or any other national origin) was sworn in?” I may be wrong, so forgive me if I am – it could be that I might not have been paying close enough attention before – but I honestly, don’t recall ever seeing so much fear about a Supreme Court Justice prior to now. Yet, this lady with a warm smile who is about the height of my own mother and could pass for my slightly older sister, has to endure these openly embarassing questions and remarks, most which were generated by the media and are truly unfounded and baseless, for they had nothing to do with passed legislation. Well, I can say this, as I am nobody in the grand scheme of things – I am not Judge Sotomayor and in the vernacular I can say – “It aint easy being a woman, let a lone a Latina one,” but at times it isn’t easy being a man either.

When President Obama was running for the Presidency, I received so many defamatory e-mails about him, some from acquaintances (not close friends) that I respected and folks that I thought to be really nice people. Some of the messages were horribly racist e-mails and they made me wonder if I even wanted to be associated with the persons who forwarded them to me. I am forgiving by nature so I shrugged it off to their actions being a consequence of their own personal fears. One of the messages, actually made me cry. It was an e-mail suggesting that our new President is the Anti-Christ. People are sadly and easily mislead by fear.

Something tells me though, that Judge Sotomayor’s wisdom will carry her through and my feelings about this have nothing to do with the fact that we happen to share the same heritage.

I was and I am still a very big admirer of Justice Sandra Day O’Connor. Goodness, I loved her cool, calm collected posture. To me, she was amazing and still is quite a brilliant and amazing woman! I dislike television intensely these days, but I saw her on a recent talk show and endured the pain of watching the show, just to take in her interview. When asked by the show’s host if she (Sandra Day O’Connor) had ever felt that they, the Supreme Court Justices, ever felt that they “might have blown a few here and there,” (meaning mistakes that were made during the passing of certain legislation) – She very candidly replied (paraphrased) “Oh, we blew more than a few,” to the raucous laughter of the audience. She confessed that she was humbled when she took her post as a Supreme Court justice and that she never stopped learning, further adding that she realized on her way out of the job as a justice, that there were still many things that she never knew that she had needed to learn, even as she left her post.

Well, regardless of what the Senate decides, I truly have a positive feeling about Judge Sotomayor. OK, I’ll come clean, the warm compassionate side of my Hispanic heritage does tell me, she’s going to be a super Supreme Court judge and a judge for ALL people, a truly fair Supreme Court Justice. After all, the Puerto Rican culture comes from a blend of many national origins due to the migration of people who came to the island from all over the world. People of German, Dutch, Italian, African, Spanish and French ancestry, who arrived at Puerto Rico’s ports and inter-married with the indigenous people of the island. The culture has an amazingly rich history, not that that would have so much to do with how well someone in Judge Sotomayor’s capacity would perform as a justice. I just feel that the lady carries with her the quality of empathy required to be one of the justices of the Supreme Court. Her record proves first and foremost that she is more than qualified to assume the highest court and she would do a great job at it, possibly better than the next “guy” or “gal”. I don’t believe that her referring to herself as Latina is something she should apologize for. If she has offended, I am sure folks will in time, get over this. Being happy with one’s culture and being confident in one’s own abilities and speaking out about it, should never be considered some sort of a crime.

She has the experience, attitude and good nature, required to do the job. Period. For this reason, I believe that Judge Sonia Sotomayor can truly be a very effective and impartial Supreme Court Justice. Anyone who knows the history of the Puerto Rican culture and has an open mind, will come to realize this, add to that the great mix of intellect, a high education and New York roots (New York is a melting pot) and there’s no doubt, that Judge Sotomayor is going to excell in the new post. If she lives through the Senate hearing without a meltdown, I believe that the experience of sitting through such a torturous Senate hearing alone, will make her wiser, more open to change and far stronger than might have previously been imagined.

There’s no doubt that Judge Sotomayor will continue to be under the microscope, but in time, I am sure she will grow into that huge seat that she may soon occupy.

Kudos to you Judge Sotomayor. Keep your chin up. I have the feeling “Your In”!

What is Fear?

What is fear? Fear is just an emotion. While it serves to protect us, it can also play a major role in leading us away from a less beaten path, the right path, a path that though less traveled, can lead us to finding the success that many dream of acquiring, a success usually not found by following the herd, working for a corporation and collecting a paycheck. Success is truly what the few who make it to the top, experience. Those are the people who feel the fear and do what they do anyway and they make it – Kudos to them!

What is fear? Fear is nothing more than an emotion that we manifest, at the thought about the worst possible thing that can happen to us. The power of fear is not fear itself, but the power that we give IT to cripple or hinder us. That is fear, an emotion and nothing more. We are the ones, who give fear the power to control us and block us from getting from point A to point B.

For many years I was afraid of trying new things, afraid of speaking out at meetings, worried about the consequences of saying the wrong thing, worried about being judged by others and making the wrong choices. After years of living in fear, it took a courageous act of closing my eyes and boldly deciding that I would not live in fear any longer. That was the day that my life would change forever. I was missing out on life, time was slipping by, while I saw others succeeding and I was going nowhere very fast. I decided that living in the clutches of another person’s dream, was not at all how God truly had intended for me to live.

God did not intend for any of us to live with a spirit of fear. We were not meant to be fearful of people, or what they might do to us. We were not intended to fear our friends, our husbands or wives. We were intended to be tenderly loved by them and rewarded for being kind enough to protect, love and support them. If we feel fear about something, it is not so much the person or thing who is causing us to fear that is the problem, but the power that we are giving our fear to control our own actions.

We are the ones who give fear the power to keep us where we may find ourselves at the moment – unhappy, unfulfilled, working at a dead-end job, living in the denial that we are really in an unhappy, unsatisfying marriage. Fear is what says to us, “Stay, keep the peace, why go through all of the trouble of expressing what you want and cause even more of a stir.” We give fear the power to suppress our thoughts and actions and that fear causes us to give up the chance to be truly happy.

I have stopped that awful pattern of behavior that often prevents people from achieving their goals and dreams. No, I have not stopped feeling fear of failure when trying something new, but yes, I have the courage to give new things a try despite my fear of failure. It is all about how one views things and keeping one’s emotions in the proper perspective.

It is “ok” for us to experience fear, but we should never let fear cripple us to the point that something wonderful, something that may be at the cusp of a breakthrough, may elude us because we have become too fearful to proceed in that less traveled direction. It is always fine to proceed with a bit of trepidation, but I no longer let the fear of trying out a new creative venture, or starting a new business, stop me from trying to set my dreams in motion.

I strongly feel that others should consider putting aside their fears for once and taking a chance at doing something different. Unfortunately, we have been locked down by conventionalism, so much so, that we won’t always have the foresight to see, that one day someone will move our cheese and we will not find it where we were always accustomed to finding it (“Who Moved My Cheese?” – a great book by About Spencer Johnson, M.D.!) and soon we may be reduced to whining like children when we don’t get what we have been accustomed to getting.

We should stop letting fear control us, if we fail, at least we will have failed by trying and not by not having tried at all. Everyone owes it to themselves to give themselves a chance at trying to succeed without a paycheck at one time or another. It may be, that one defining moment of truth, where we may truly learn that we have what it takes to survive without a weekly paycheck.

I’m not saying that a person should quit their job and start a business cold turkey. What I am saying is that it is good for someone who does lose their job, to seize that opportunity to prove to themselves, that they do have what it takes to survive without a paycheck being handed to them and not giving fear even one fleeting thought. The experience of learning to sustain ourselves, is said to be quite a character builder.

There is a lot to fear these days, there is the fear of losing our jobs. Jobs that in years past, were solid jobs with promising pensions and sound retirements. Those great jobs are fast becoming a thing of the past. Yes, a job does guarantee a steady paycheck, but even our jobs are no longer safe from the axe. Going to an office each day wondering if that will be the day that the axe will fall, causes us to expend a good deal of energy and experience high stress levels and anxiety attacks. Fear does nothing but paralyze us and zap us of our mental clarity. We cannot think clearly or see straight, or perform at maximum potential, when we are in constant fear of being fired, or when we are in a constant state of paranoia, because we cannot help free ourselves of the lack of trust in others. Therefore, yes, having a job and getting a paycheck does not preclude feelings of fear, stress, anxiety and distrust.

Instead of letting that fear control us, a great time to start to plan our financial future, is while we still have our jobs. It is when we should put fear in the back seat and plan ahead – while we still have jobs to go to and start working on simplifying our lives, skinning the fat and watching our spending patterns. It does not hurt to pare down our lavish ways, while keeping watch over how the state of the economy may create new opportunities, which in turn create new demands that can be met by new small businesses – businesses that can be started from homes on a shoestring.

It does not hurt to use fear to our advantage, putting our best foot forward, while feeling the fear and doing it anyway, can be quite liberating and proof of who we truly are intellectually, physically and spiritually.

Feeling fear and worrying about the future takes more stamina to manifest and deprives us of our mental capabilities to stay focused. It’s harder to live with fear, than when we make a conscious decision to stop the onset of fear, to take time to think, take stock of what we can lose from being paralyzed by fear and what we stand to gain from giving up our fear. If we choose to use the tools that are placed before us, while ignoring our fears, we are soon on our way and a head of the game.

Sometimes the tools we encounter, may look too good to be true. We fail to realize that someone created them, who went through our exact same experience. Someone who was afraid of losing their job at one time, so they set out to create a tool that would prove quite useful to others out there, if would only let go of our fears.

Letting go of our fears, is what ultimately liberates us and we are better able to strike up a way to start a new business and choose instead to control our destiny, rather than wait and just let destiny happen to us. So rather than worrying, it may be a better idea to imagine the worse that can happen, while we plan ahead in case it does happen. Again, feel the fear and do it anyway, is still one of the best policies for success. Fear is nothing more than an emotion. Don’t give it the power and it will not render you helpless. Fear is only an emotion.

Here is a Powerful Video to Watch

What True Wealth Really is

True wealth is the art of basking in the joy and fulfillment that we bring to others, through our benevolence and our demonstrations of genuine love.  http://ping.fm/qWk0n

Blast from the Past: Friends Meet Again

 

While doing some public relations work for two artist friends, at an Art Exhibit Opening and Reception thrown for Artists – Aguilar Marrero and Reina Miranda of  Taino Spirit – at Bronx Borough Hall, I was blessed to be re-acquainted with a good friend from my teenage years, now Whitehouse Director of Urban Affairs, Adolfo Carrion, Jr. 

I knew Carrion Jr. as a teenager when I sang at his Dad’s church in Eldrige Street in New York City.  I was just 14 years old . We were both innocent youngsters who used to worship at meetings and youth rallies, where  my sisters and I were invited to sing. Filled with gladness we were able to catch up a little about the good old days and were in disbelief of how quickly time passes.  I always remembered the Director of Urban Affair’s family being an upstanding family of extremely high values and especially remember the priceless advice that his mother dispensed, during those times when I really needed it most.  His parents were two people of the highest calibre that I deeply admired and highly respected.  

I served as Secretary of the Embajadores de Cristo (Ambassadors of Christ) Brooklyn Chapter for one year in 1977 and was elected District Secretary of the Embajadores de Cristo’s entire Eastern Spanish District in 1978, yet for another year – a monumental task that I still have no idea how that happened, except for God’s grace. (Of course, I am stronger, more mature and much better equipped now to handle that job if I had to do it today.)   Wherever there was an EC event, there we all were, the EC youth, happy to join in on the youth rallies and activities that were afforded to us by the EC.   Adolfo Carrion, Jr.?   Popular,  earnest, fun loving, well adjusted and loved by all – the guy most likely to succeed – he was always everywhere we went, lighting up events with his trademark smile and people swarming around him.  Everyone looked up to and turned to Adolfo Carrion, Jr.   It seems that does not change.  It’s rare to hold private audience with him now as it was then.  Nothing has changed about that, but naturally it’s for the good of the Bronx these days and pretty soon for the good of all of New York City.  

I never doubted for one second that Carrion Jr. would excel to the heights of his existing political career.  He has always possessed several  important qualities.  He, just like his Dad before him, is brilliant and someone who genuinely cares about people.  When news of his election to Bronx Borough President broke 7 years ago, it was not news to me at all.  I knew, as thousands of other people who came to meet him in his youth, that Adolfo Carrion, Jr. had the potential to make it to where he is today and no doubt make it even further, again, because he is an earnest person who continues tocare about people. 

Those who know Carrion Jr., I am certain, will continue to support him, bearing one very important fact – they know first hand, not through the press, or the evening news, that the man is an upstanding person, who is a shaker and a doer (i.e., bringing public focus to the plight of the people of Vieques, PR, when not very many people were looking and did not care about what was happening there) who does not lose his heart to politics alone, but who continues to allow himself to be guided by the knowledge of the needs of others – which makes me wonder what’s next for Carrion Jr.  – City Comptroller in 2009?   Well, that sounds great to me.

I am normally not big on accolades and not that Carrion, Jr. needs validation from me or anyone else for that matter, but this is just one of those things that I genuinely feel needs to be said, and that is that Adolfo Carrion, Jr. is a great person and one of the most exemplary people, that I have ever known.  

Carmen Amoros Goldberg

Photo Courtesy of

Http://www.CarmenGoldbergMedia.Com